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New Year’s Resolution: Stop ‘dousing’ The Flames

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We all love a good pun, but haven’t we used this one enough?

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Sergei Belski-USA TODAY Sports

2015 was a wild ride for The Flames with many highs and lows. From blasting the Canucks in the first round of the playoffs, to getting 'roasted' by the Ducks in the second round; from trading for Dougie Hamilton, to the goaltending conundrums of this fall. This team has had a lot of interesting stories to read about. However, through all of that excitement, all of the ups and downs, one thing continuously irked me: every time the Flames lost a game some clever headline writer would say "Team X douses Flames".

This pun needs to be extinguished.

Islanders douse Flames as Halak sets team's win record - 2/27/2015 - New York Post

Connor McDavid notches first NHL two-goal game as Edmonton Oilers douse Calgary Flames - 10/28/2015 - National Post

Coyotes douse Flames on Oliver Ekman-Larsson's OT goal - 11/27/2015 - FOX Sports

Blues douse Flames' winning streak at seven games - 12/19/2015 - NBC Sports

Ramo hot but Ducks still douse Flames - 5/3/2015 - Globe and Mail

Jets douse Flames - 10/3/2015 - Winnipeg Sun

We all love a good pun. They sneak up on you and make you chuckle for a moment when you didn't expect to. But when one is repeated over and over, and starts being used by everyone, it loses becomes much more tedious than humorous. "The Flames ‘doused' again". Yawn. The proliferation of this pun is, of course, not a recent phenomenon. You can find examples going back many years.

NY Rangers stay red hot, douse Flames with 5-2 victory - 12/27/2014 NY Daily News

It wasn't pretty, but Maple Leafs douse Flames (DiManno warning) - 10/30/2013 - Toronto Star

Flyers rally to douse Flames in shootout - 2/26/2012 - Sportsnet

Stamkos to the rescue as Bolts douse Flames - 12/26/2011 Sportsnet

Sometimes it's even used in the preview of a game!

Game Day: Canucks call on Ryan Miller to douse Flames - 4/23/2015 - Vancouver Sun

Ducks return from mountains eager to douse Flames - 4/30/2015 - CTV

It's not just those writers geographically far and away from the team who use it. Even the Calgary Herald has gotten in on the act this season, and so has the Globe and Mail.

Defending champs score three quick second period goals to douse flames -11/15/2015 - Calgary Herald

Defensive Ducks douse Flames' home win streak - 12/29/2015 - Calgary Herald

Duchene scores 2 goals as Avalanche douse Flames - 11/4/2015 Globe and Mail

Lucic scores one, saves one as Kings douse Flames - 1/1/2016 Globe and Mail

Even our friends across SB Nation have also favoured dousing The Flames this season:

Panthers douse Flames to snap five-game losing streak - 11/11/2015 - Litter Box Cats

Quick Bite: Sharks douse Flames - 11/29/2015 - Fear The Fin

Red Wings Fight Fire With Fire, Douse Flames - 12/20/2015 - Winging it in Motown

How does one even douse Flames with fire, WIIM?

My admittedly quick Google search did find some bright spots out there. CBC has not used it for years, and Sportsnet appears to have dropped it as well.

Look, I appreciate its simplicity. A single short word that communicates what happened. It's not a bad pun once and a while, but we're basically being smothered with it. There doesn't seem to be such a lack of creativity in the opposite situation. When The Flames win they burn, sizzle, roast, and scorch (though let's not talk about that Scorch). So why does losing have to be so literally moribund.

Let's make a resolution that this year that when The Flames lose we can say they are smothered, snuffed, blown out, suppressed, stamped out, or extinguished, but that the days of dousing are over!